1. Build up your list of words for conversation. They can be through reading, listening or writing.  Pay attention to new and existing words used in different ways, and learn to use them correctly.  This is done every now and then in your everyday life, before actual conversation.  More often than not, people are lost with the right words then the thoughts.  They lack the ability to express their words in a more vivid manner.  They lack the ability to join, break, make similarities or differences, or interlink their sentences (thoughts) together.  And this can be a problem when you want to express or influence your partner in continuing the conversation.
2. Start with common topics such as the weather, family, job, company, neighbourhood that he is living in, financial market, children, education, hobbies, interests and the recently released movie.  You see, it can be anything!  You may find that these topics are boring! However, not only these topics allow you to understand your partner better, it can also spawn off many more topics for your conversation than you have thought off initially!  Talking about personal stuff can also build trust and open up your partner.  In the event that you run out of topic in a conversation, look back on the list here!  We are sure that you still can continue with the conversation with these everyday topics. J
3. Watch out for break points in the conversation or sentences. Use these break points as junctions for you to inject your sentences or express your thoughts.  Not only can you reciprocate with your partner, by agreeing or disagreeing with a simple nod, you get a chance of swaying the direction of the conversation.  How?  These break points are good for you to switch topic smartly and graciously.  You can use, “By the way, I recently…”, “Anyway, have you watch…” which are some examples to sway the conversation to another direction.  However, do find the correct break points.  By injecting at the wrong time, or commonly known as interrupting, it illustrates your impatience, insensitiveness, lack of interest and courtesy.
4. Finally, watch out for keywords that your partner is using.  These keywords are used by your partner for a certain reason.  Keywords can also be used for you to find avenues to spawn another topic or question.  Two things you should do on keywords: (1) acknowledge it and (2) keep track of it.  By acknowledging, you affirm your understanding of your partners concerns.  This is important as humans “want to be heard”.  By keeping tracking of the keyword, you have a new avenue to spawn a new topic to continue with the conversation.  Example of acknowledgment: “I’m reluctant…” can be responded with “I see that you may not be comfortable with…, however, would it be possible to tell me more about your actual concern?  I like to address it with my capabilities…” Example of tracking keywords: “I love watching TV series” may open a possibility of a topic on movies (through swaying) where you can respond in “What about movies? Do you watch movies too?”

These are just some tricks that can be used for you to keep the conversation going and avoid being in the moment of silence leaving everyone feeling a little uneasy. Share with us if you have other tricks too! J

1. Be open about yourself – The first thing that you should ever do when you want people to talk is to be open about yourself.  Being open about yourself allows people to be comfortable with you.  How?  You give them trust by sharing information about yourself first.  In this way, people respond with theirs.  If you do not start somewhere, then it will be difficult to maintain the conversation for long.
2. Avoid talking too much of yourself – Being open is the first step that you should take too build trust in a conversation.  However, avoid the loophole of talking too much of yourself.  This becomes self-centeredness and attempting to put the focal point of discussion around you.  A right touch (amount) of self information that portrait openness is good.  Too much of it will irritate and bored your partner.  They will only view you as being self-indulging and living in your own world.
3. Be genuine curious and interested about your other partner but – Be genuine interested in finding out more about your partner.  By being curious about your partner, you tend to come out with questions that can relate to your partner.  When your partner finds that you are really interested in them (and after building trust between you and him), he will more likely share more information with you.
4. Give the right balance amount of attention to everyone in a conversation –In a group conversation, usually, there will be one or two “alphas” that lead the conversation.  And usually you are one of them as you are taking the lead to get people talking.  Be it any conversation; give rights to everybody for them to voice their opinion.  If they lack the initiative to speak, ask for their opinion or consensus instead.  Example, “Mary, do you agree with the Joe’s comment about banker’s salary?”  In this way, the introvert Mary will not feel left out in the conversation and you assisted to be brought into the conversation.
5. Bring similarities of topic in a conversation – Another tip in group conversation where there are individuals that lack initiative in voicing their opinion; Assist to bridge similar experiences of different individuals together.  Example, “Joe loves rock climbing.  He does that every weekend!  Hey, Mary, you are a rock climber too right?”  In this way, you bring two experiences (topic) together and a common topic both Joe and Mary can follow through.

Use these conversational tips to get people talking!  Are there other tips that you used to get people talking in a conversation or to break the silence?

1. Forgetting to follow-up – You forgotten to follow-up with the recipient after he requested for you to follow-up either through the email again or through a phone call. Honestly, you will not look good if you are doing this all the time.  Your recipient will feel that you are always not contactable, irresponsible or not interested in attending to their emails (which usually they feel this way).  Remember to follow-up promptly.  Set a flag to follow-up if you cannot do it on the spot.  At least, it’s now in your to-do-list.
2. Sending to the wrong person – Ensure that you are sending to the right person.  Email programs are often too smart and recognize the wrong similar name in the staff directory.  Review your list of recipients before you send out to avoid confusion in them.
3. Sending mass emails – Ensure that you are not sending email to the entire organisation.  Similar to sending the wrong person, you create confusion to the entire organisation.  You are also become the “careless clown” for sending emails to recipients not intended to receive it.  And hopefully it is nothing sensitive and personal that can put you in a really embarrassing situation.
4. Forgetting the attachment – A common mistake made by most of us.  We completed the content of the email and send it out.  Later to realize that you have forgotten to attaché the document relevant to the email.  Either you follow-up with an additional email apologizing about the blunder and include the attachments or you wait for your recipient to write back asking about the missing attachments.  Therefore, review your emails before you send!
5. Not leaving contact information when you asked your recipients to contact you – Your recipient will be feeling, “DUH!” You forgotten to include your contact information such as phone number for them to get back to you after requesting them to get back to you over the phone.  One small careless mistake illustrates your carelessness in emailing and rushing to send the email out.
6. Clicking “Send” too fast – Another common mistake made by many of us.  Often we rush in our content of the email and attempt to send it in the shortest time we can.  In this way, you may fail to review your email and commit the above mentioned mistakes such as sending to the wrong person and forgetting to attach the relevant documents to the email.  Slow down cow-boy!  Review your email before you move your mouse over to the “Send” button!

1. Improve your vocabulary – The problem most of us face is our limited vocabulary of words.  We do not understand the words used when they are used in the communication.  We may even misinterpret its meaning to something we think it should be.  This is problematic!  When we misinterpret words, we risk the chance of misinterpreting the objective of what the other party wants to achieve!  To avoid such problem, the only way is to improve our vocabulary.  By improving our vocabulary, we know more words; our arsenal of words that can be used in communication also increases.  It becomes easier to communicate as we are flexible in our available of words to use.  We can use different words to convey the same meaning to another party when they have difficulty understanding it.  On another view point, the arsenal of words allows you to better understand messages convey to you too!
2. Ask when in doubt – Do not feel embarrassed to ask what a word means even if you’re in the middle of a conversation.  Obviously, it would be pretty difficult to complete the building the list of words in our arsenal.  Clarify with that person on the meaning of the word.  Loosen up on the egoism.  Break free from fear of being mock at.  You benefit more than you know you can loose more by clarifying the meaning of the words.
3. Speak more – You become more effective by practising what you learn.  This greatly applies to communication.  The more you speak and use the new learned words (and phrases), the more proficient and confident you are in using them.  You will be also more comfortable when someone communicates to you using the same word and phrases.
4. Listen more – Same with taking time to speak more.  You get more confident in the new words.  You learn how the new words are being used in different context.  Through listening more, you become more aware of its proper usage and also wrong usage of the words.

To sum up, it is critical to improve communication skills by increasing our vocabulary.  An improved vocabulary allows you to understand and convey message better to another party.  However, building a complete set of vocabulary may take ages to do so.  Therefore, learn from different available channels as much as you can.  Such as clarifying when you are in doubt in the middle of the conversation, taking chance to speak more and listen more.  All these, will help you beef up your communication skills and avoid any misinterpretation.

1. Develop your voice – Have a voice that is authoritative and firm. When you are pitching at a high voice, it makes you sound whinney. It maybe even perceived as acting “cute”. Your voice gives assurance of what you can deliver and who you are.
2. Slow down – You maybe unaware that you are speaking faster than usual. Are you excited? Are you nervous or unsure? Whatever the case, it may differ in different person. However, the key thing is you must speak at the speed your listener is comfortable with for them to absorb what you are speaking.
3. Animate your voice – Give life to your voice. We know you may sound cool with a monotone. Be dynamic. Your tone should go up and down. Your volume should change on emphasis of important things. People will be drawn by your speech.
4. Don’t mumble – Speak clearly. Don’t mumble. You are not talking to yourself!
5. Use appropriate volume – Use the correct volume for the context. You may want to lower your volume when you are alone, close and want to express concern. You may want to speak louder when you are addressing a large group of people.
6. Pronounce your words correctly – Be sure of what you say. People associate your intelligence with your vocabulary. If you are not sure how to say a word, our advice is do not even use it.
7. Use the right words – Similarly with pronunciation, if you are unsure of the meaning of a word or phrase, don’t use it. It makes you look silly. Learn a new word everyday to build up your vocabulary.
8. Make eye contact – Have eye contact with the person you are talking to. Show your interest that you are and like talking to the person. Just imagine that you are talking to someone that is always looking elsewhere except you.
9. Use gestures – Use every part of your body to talk. Gestures inject more life to the conversation. However, use gestures appropriately and avoid those negative ones. You do not want to be seen scratching your forehead most of the time, right?
10. Don’t send mixed messages – Your volume, message, facial expressions, gesture and tone must be consistent. Unless you have agenda to send mixed messages to the one you are talking to.